When the seasons change, you break out your infinity scarves and stashes of hot chocolate and snuggle up on the couch with one of your favorite rom-coms. You also start thinking about the guy you’ve been talking to in your English class all semester. He’s asked you to get coffee while you peer-review each other’s papers and he texts you outside of class to see if you have any plans on the weekends. So he’s starting to have real relationship potential! Although the temperature is dropping, it may be time to turn up the heat and “cuff him” for the winter.
So What is “Cuffing Season” Exactly?
Cuffing season is that time of the year when most people ditch their summer flings and settle down during the wintertime.
“In the winter, when we think of cold, we think of shrinking, we think of retreating,” says Patrick Wanis, a human behavior and relationship expert. “The rain, the wind and the actual cold temperature tend to change our desire to go out… have new encounters and form new friendships.”
This season comes with the perks of avoiding being single during the holidays as well as having a steady cuddle buddy for those cold winter nights. You see these benefits, but does he? Here the top four reasons guys are embracing cuffing season this winter.
Reason #1: It’s not Always Seasonal
Even though the colder months and cuffing season will eventually come to an end, that doesn’t mean that your relationship will.
“I really thought [my relationship] was just going to be like hooking up most of the time,” says Robert, a sophomore at the University of Arkansas. “I started seeing this girl at the beginning of the school year, but around Thanksgiving, things started getting more serious than I thought they would. She met my family and celebrated Christmas with me.”
Even though the weather may be cold and you may be emotionally retreating for the winter, that doesn’t mean that love won’t find you. “This is the first real relationship I’ve ever been in… ,” Robert says. “It’s been… a year since we’ve started dating, and I don’t want it to end.”
Reason #2: It’s Nice to Have a Date for the Holidays
Guys like arm candy as much as girls do. They like for their pesky aunts and competitive cousins to see that they are putting themselves out there and finding success in their relationships.
“My girlfriend visited me over Christmas break and spent the holiday with my family,” says Andrew, a junior at Saint Louis University. “She got along really well with all of my cousins, and it was nice to just have an ally around me all night.”
But it’s important to note that guys don’t necessarily get into relationships solely for the sake of having a date to family functions. Dan, a sophomore at the University of Missouri, says, “I could see people wanting to bring someone around for the holidays to show their family they aren’t a hermit, but I don’t think they are consciously thinking, ‘I can’t wait until the holidays are over so we can break up.’”
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Reason #3: Guys are Happy in Their Comfort Zones
For many of us collegiettes, the start of winter means the ceremonious ushering in of sweatpants season. And while we think it’s not easy to find a guy when you’re rocking your slightly worn, three-year-old sweats from freshman year, there’s good news! Guys don’t want to ditch their comfy sweatpants either. “When we retreat for the winter, we’re not working out as much, and we’re wearing heavier clothes,” Mike Lindstrom, co-author of Men: 10 Secrets Every Woman Should Know from Two Guys That Do, says. “We would rather have someone who accepts us for who we are.”
Brian, a junior at Maryville University, enjoyed casual nights in with his girlfriend during the winter. “When my ex-girlfriend and I were together last winter, she would always just come over, wearing one of my hoodies that she had taken from me, and we would just watch movies,” he says. “After a while, we didn’t care that we weren’t looking our best. And it was cold, so we had an excuse to be all bundled up.”
While you may be thinking that you’ve set your sights lower in the wintertime, that’s not totally true, according to Wanis. “We have different expectations, different desires, different goals and different objectives [in the winter],” he says. “And the objective is to have a companion, have someone that we know is there and that we know can satisfy our other needs of friendship and companionship.”
Reason #4: Cuffing Season Can Be Temporary… and That’s Okay, Too
The cold eventually subsides and the winter eventually ends, making room for spring and all the change it brings. And for many relationships formed during cuffing season, this could spell the end for you and your beau.
“My ex-girlfriend and I got together at the beginning of first semester, and it seemed like we were going to be together for a while,” says Tyler, a senior at the University of Missouri. “We drove around looking at Christmas lights before [winter] break, came back from [winter] break and then things started to get rocky after about a month. We just kind of fizzled out right before spring break.”
When spring comes, we want to stretch our legs and expand from our holiday-induced food coma and cabin fever. Wanis agrees: “Once we get past the cold season and we’ve been indoors for all this time, that’s when we want to be free again. And along comes the summer fling.”
Since we’re in the middle of cuffing season, enjoy this time with your man. Put some popcorn in the microwave, tear open a packet of hot chocolate and rev up your Netflix. Spring is a long way away, and it’s time to cuddle.