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Why I Won’t Now, or Ever, Meet You for Coffee

Her Campus Placeholder Avatar Chelsea Lowell
Her Campus Placeholder Avatar Melissa Paniagua
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Chapel Hill chapter.

I won’t meet you for coffee because you lack emotional intelligence.  I discovered that it’s not that you have little emotional intelligence, it’s that you have none.  The worst habits of “stonewalling” and isolating others in relationships…yep, you guessed it – you embody them all.

I won’t meet you for coffee because I remember all the times you called other girls “hot” in front of me when you couldn’t have paid me a compliment if a gun was pointed at your head.

I won’t meet you for coffee because you made me stand in the cold outside your house while you yelled at me because one of my friends didn’t say “hi” to you.

I won’t meet you for coffee because I got tired of waiting on you to call and when you did it was to ask if I could do your homework or if you could borrow something.

I won’t meet you for coffee because you let your friend (a 22-year-old man) push me and scream in my face when I spoke to you and congratulated you on your brother’s engagement.  You watched. Your friends watched.

I won’t meet you for coffee because you ignored me.  At parties you talked to other girls and when the parties ended and I was in your room, you sat down without speaking and watched TV.

I won’t meet you for coffee because you may not remember how horribly you treated me.  You were almost always drunk when I saw you, but I will always remember.

I won’t meet you for coffee because I finally got the courage to break up with you and no, I don’t want you as a friend.

I won’t meet you for coffee because you started hooking up with a girl in your friend group a week after our relationship ended and I will never know if you cheated on me or not.

I won’t meet you for coffee because you are controlling and arrogant.  No, I won’t “fix the damn covers” for you anymore.

I won’t meet you for coffee because no relationship is better than a terrible one and because I believe if you treated me this way, you are capable of treating all women this way.

I won’t meet you for coffee because I don’t like coffee.  And after a year and a half you still didn’t know that about me.  

Images:

(coffee): http://cdn.theatlantic.com/static/mt/assets/food/coffee-615.jpg

(girl): http://mssinglemama.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/06/woman_alone.jpg

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Melissa Paniagua

Chapel Hill

Melissa Paniagua is a senior journalism major at The University of North Carolina – Chapel Hill, specializing in public relations. She is currently a fashion market intern at ELLE Magazine. On campus, Melissa acts as the Her Campus president as well as the vice president of the Carolina Association of Future Magazine Editors, UNC’s Ed2010 chapter. In the past, she has been an intern for Southern Weddings Magazine and a contributing writer for Her Campus. Melissa has an appreciation for all things innovative, artful and well designed and hopes to work in marketing for a women’s lifestyle magazine in the future!